It is very likely that the birth mother may not live in Virginia. Because people travel between states so frequently, it comes as something of a surprise to many people that this makes a big difference in adoption. Adoption law is almost entirely state law, and differences in the laws between the states are very substantial. The fact that the birth mother lives in another state does not jeopardize the adoption, but it does add a significant layer of additional laws to be complied with.
If you receive a call from a birth mother in another state, you should be prepared to hop on the next flight to go meet her. From my experience, distances createsin themind of the birth motehr a certain doubt about how serious you are. She may find it much easier to change her mind if you are not in her state. By going to meet her, you make it clear to her that distance is not a problem and that you will do whateer it takes to make the adoption work.
Because there are 51 different systems of adoption in the United States, and because it matters a great deal which state is the sending state and which is the receiving state, there are different strategies that can be used. You should be prepared to retain a competenet adoption attorney in the birth mother's state as soon as possible after a preliminary understanding with the birth mother has been reached. Your Virginia attorney will speak with the attorney in the sending state and a plan will be reached as to how the legal requirements can best be satisfied. Because you need an adoption attorney in both states, interstate adoptions are somewhat more expensive.